but well i hope all goes well and works itself out in the end!

so on leap day 2016 after the exams the boyfriend and i both went ahead with our own plans. he went off to attend his company D&D and i rushed off to meet my girlfriends for a movie!!! was so happy because frankly it's been agessssssss since i last met them and they still look so pretty. *heart eyes emoji* watched a british-indian horror film, the other side of the door or something. pretty okay story line, but it was more of a sad film than a scary film to me. after all, everything started because of a mother's love for her child and her desperate attempts to communicate with him one last time. 3/5 popcorns imo! jumpscares aplenty though. i stopped eating halfway because i am uber prone to being scared by random jumpscares and i was so afraid of getting myself choked and being a nuisance in the theatre LOL.

after a good night out with good company, yesterday (01/03/2016) i went to have my wisdom teeth extracted ... again. previously, i extracted the two on the left side of my face. right now i can't sleep and it's sorta painful to talk or yawn, so i'm here blogging. my uber-loving boyfriend kept me company and took me to the dental clinic, waited close to an hour for me to be done, then sent me home and stayed with me until he went off to get his work stuff settled. am so grateful and happy to have someone as patient as him in my life. it was quite funny and interesting to see how he was able to understand my weird sign language and random noises and always almost instantly pick up on the messages i'm trying to convey to him. i'm just so lucky. ♥

so maybe i'm 'not as lucky' as other girls out there who are constantly showered with gifts, surprises, cute short getaways to fun places, lovely comfortable stay-cations, and so on. but i'm still pampered enough because my boyfriend gives me his full attention and time and his true love. that to me is really worth more than a necklace from tiffany & co., or a pair of charlotte olympia heels. well, that's not to say i wouldn't jump with joy should i ever receive such gifts. we all want to be pampered, male or female, and showered with affection in all forms, material or not. but well, at my age now (yes i'm actually quite old, how sad), that solvil et titus watch just doesn't have the same allure as it did when i was a few years younger.

but this is really pretty.

i always try to reassure my boyfriend that it's okay if he can't give me this or that. i love money and i love fancy things and i love nice gifts (don't we all, really). somewhere in the hidden corners of my soul there is a materialistic woman. i'm not perfect and i have my various sides to me. but right now, bf and i are still pursuing our diplomas. yes, i do sometimes envy my friends and other humans who seem to have it all and are happily living the high life, the very life i want for myself. but i just have to come to terms with the fact that i'm just different from them and i have to work a little harder than them to get what i want. we're all lucky in our own ways. i try not to go overboard with the envy, and neither do i harbor any hate for them or extreme jealousy. in fact, it's a good thing that they're all happy and living life well. i try to use them as little reminders that someday, i can get there too.

so instead of just whining about what i don't have, most times now i just tell bf that we can study hard together, work hard together, save up together, and then live our happy life in future together. i also just try to cherish whatever i have on hand right now - because tbh, whatever you claim to be unhappy with, someone out there will always be wishing they had it. and i'm trying to be a little less materialistic and a little more in touch with being mature. :'D look it just naturally comes with age okay ...

maybe i come across as pretty fake to some, but well, this is really who i am. i'm genuinely happy staying in with movies, snacks and a couple of beers with bf right now, as happy as i was back when i was single and always heading out to parties. i do miss partying and i'm quite sure i'll not let it slip away from my life, but for now i'm content being the way i am right now.

so, hooray to semester break. here's to hoping all goes well and that i'll heal well soon enough to satisfy this strong craving for strawberries and dragonfruit i currently am fighting.

xo